So, long overdue, here is an Excerpt from The Story of the Waiting Man. This part concerns the waiting man’s attempts to learn to juggle. Please leave me some feedback, let me know what you think of the voice I’m using, the style of writing, the content, how pretty I am. That sort of thing. (By the way I know how pretty I am, I just like compliments)
Puts his hands into his pocket. Pauses. Brings his hands out slowly, holding 3 juggling balls. He begins to juggle. Well at first, but then he loses it. He starts again, loses it again, then a third time.
He learnt to juggle whilst he waited. It had been something he always wanted to teach himself. He’d tried when he was waiting for something to do at work, serve a customer or collect some empty glasses. He’d tried whilst he was waiting for his dinner to cook. But every time he started to improve, his dinner would finish cooking or someone would want to buy a drink.
But in his current position, his waiting repose, he had the time. So he started to juggle. He improved. He could almost juggle.
But then, one of his balls rolled too far away.
Roll one of the balls out to the audience
He could have simply left his place of waiting and retrieved the stray ball. He considered doing just that, but the man was worried that if he did someone might take his things or that he might miss what he was waiting for. So he stopped juggling. And continue to wait.
So that’s that bit. Here’s another bit that goes very early on in the script. I quite like it, but am still keen for feedback. So let me know please.
There is a man, maybe this man is me. But then again, maybe not. It’s not important. What is important is that this man is there and there he is waiting.
He is dressed in clothes similar to my own. Like me he is dusty. The objects, luggage, mess and general bric-a-brac that surrounds the man are very much a like to those that surround me. The trappings of a man who waits.
As he waits he considers how amusing it is that when a person waits, they are usually waiting to do something, and whilst they wait they have nothing to do. So they fill their time of waiting by doing a lot of things that equate to nothing. What is achieved when you complete a crossword?
So there is this man, who looks like me, is dressed like me, like me he is dusty and like me he is surrounded by the evidence of his wait.
This man is not me. Or perhaps he is. It doesn’t matter. What matters is that he is there, and there he has finished folding.
There is obviously more. I will put some of the rest of it up. I won’t put the whole thing up, I’m just going to spoon feed you bits and pieces, get some feedback (Please) and make some changes etc. Hopefully with your help this can work out to be a pretty good script. Who knows, maybe it will be great.
By the way, I wanted to upload an mp3 recording of the original script that was used in Leaping Out but I have no idea how to, so anyone that can enlighten me will be rewarded with a post that includes said recording.